Matthew Cole

yeah you're right. i probably should stop buying all those fucking banoranges

Like, f'r example, I wonder where my coworker learned that it's not only right and proper but it's actually a good thing to stand behind someone as they're typing on their personal iPad and watch what they're doing. Who taught you that, Scott?

the thing about eating pizza is that while you’re eating it all you can think is “why don’t i eat this all the time, this is perfect” but then later in the cold sobering light of day all you can think is “why aren’t i eating pizza right now, that was perfect”